I like this way of putting it:

When people ask me about atonement these days, here’s what I often ask in reply: where do you primarily locate God on Good Friday? Is God primarily located with the Romans who are crucifying Jesus, or is God primarily located in the man on the cross, suffering at the hands of sinners? Many atonement theories locate God in and with the Romans, and I think, frankly, this is a serious mistake. When you locate God not in or with the ones torturing and killing, but in and with the one being tortured and killed, everything changes.

From here.